i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
Any story that involves the words "bloody hand job" and/or "sliced penis" is bound to be a good one, right?
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize
