I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
Got hit on at a funeral service by cougar. I think I just got Reverse Will Ferrell'd.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
It's so hard to fall asleep when I can hear your genitals smacking against hers. I hate you with all the love in my heart.
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize
