I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
Must've forgot to hang up with her when I was telling Josh I plan to pop champagne if I nail her tonight. She showed up with a bottle and said "only if we can toast it with Josh"
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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