Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
