fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Randomize
