do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
My wife googled 'purchase vibrator.' Not sure if I should be excited or offended.
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
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