Walk of Shame. In a state park.
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
Just brought out that old CCM hockey helmet. The one covered in sharpie penises with "DRUNK BUCKET" written across the front. The number of tally marks / initials from tonight's drunk stunts alone is equal parts inspiring and alarming.
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
You WHAT?!?!
Paid. A. Homeless. Guy. To. Throw. A. Drink. In. Her. Face.
I fucking love you.
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize
