She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
I'm watching my cat lick a used condom wrapper on my nightstand and I'm too hungover to move and do anything about it. Tequila Tuesdays can not be a thing.
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Randomize
