please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
Randomize
