so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
Hindsight: maybe I should have included a few transitional texts in between talking about your son and my need to have sex. Do over?
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
Randomize
