Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
My mom found a condom in my purse
Correction: my mom found a used condom in my purse.
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
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