i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
Always keep a stash of tequila in your work desk. That is like adulting 101.
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
Randomize
