my dad just told me that a lesbian kissed my mom at a bar last year
I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
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