K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
She was so drunk that I kept trying to switch out her wine for water. Sort of like Jesus, but in reverse.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
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