i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
You have to summon your inner elephant
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
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