4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
I'm too high and old for this...
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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