How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
You showed up to your dad's bday dinner late, dirty, and hungover then proceeded to yell at the bartender for trying to take advantage of you by putting extra bourbon in your drink... Highly doubt you win best daughter award.
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
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