When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
And my parents said I crawled through the house
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
He left a fire sauce packet from taco bell that said "promise you'll text me in the morning" on my nightstand.
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
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