I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
Thanks for ditching me last night. I got a ride home from the Dominos delivery guy. You owe me 3 large pizzas.
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
Nothing like running into your favorite bartender in the middle of the afternoon while stone cold sober and being told your grabbed his penis the last time you were at his bar. My bad.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
Randomize