Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
Apparently, I woke up in the middle of the night, got up out of bed, dropped trou in the corner, squatted, and pissed on the carpet. When Eric heard, he thought it was the dog and started yelling, and I responded by saying "No no, its okay. It's me."
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
...take a good look at your butthole.... then try matching it to any paint color on the Benjamin Moore color wheel....not gonna happen...
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
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