my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
Randomize
