Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
they're like a gay fantastic four
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
I was hammered helping a pregnant woman at the gas station name her unborn child. We had to try everything with two different last names because she was waiting on the results of her paternity test.
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
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