i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
Randomize
