I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
Randomize
