So I'm playing pool in my cowboy boots and some guy came up looks at my boots and goes, "you should've got the boots with the fur"
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
The barista asked if I wanted my drink wet or dry, but all that came to mind was farts. You have ruined me.
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
just used my amazon order history to figure out my anniversary. I am the most epic/shittiest bf ever...
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
Randomize
