That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
I enjoy the company of your penis
Randomize
