Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
I don't know how I managed to chip the inside of my tooth w/ a turkey and cheeto sandwich, but I think that's what happened.
I'm sorry, a turkey and WHAT sandwich?!?!
Randomize
