It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
Randomize
