Porn is love you can see.
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
This morning was so rough I can't even. I was cutting up vegetables for my omelet on the floor. THE FLOOR. I sat on the floor because I felt like I was gonna vom.
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
Randomize