Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
