Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
Randomize
