My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
Randomize
