No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
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