1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
my shit smells like andre
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
Had weird bad dreams about you last night. Please tell me you didn't google my real surname and that you don't go to a needle exchange.
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
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