I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
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