I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
Chef at hibachi place learned it was my bday and sprayed 20 second count worth of saki in my mouth. Not sure it was the right image to share with my kids, but thought you'd be proud.
You know I told you about that hammering at 3 AM yesterday? Turns out it was Holly beating the lock out of her door with a mallet because she'd forgotten her keys.
Doesn't she keep a spare?
Drunk Holly doesn't listen to Sober Holly's plans.
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
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