smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
I think I just shit out all my problems.
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