Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
When was the last time you made a good decision when you could've made a shitty one
I had a salad today
Screwed a girl without a condom but hey at least you got your veggies
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
Last night you were throwing up in my toilet singing "all by myself."
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
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