It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
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