ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
My dad just asked Siri to "help me find my daughters dignity."
If you were my daughter, I'd do the same thing.
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
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