Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
17 year olds will be the death of me.
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
When you can pee with one hand accurately while texting, you drink too much.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
Randomize
