I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
I am a mess. Weirdest thing: I woke up with a hammer under my pillow. No idea why.
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
You talked the cab driver into taking a shot from your flask at a red light because "Ray Charles would want him to"
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
Randomize
