I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
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