i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
Randomize
