she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
Randomize