i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
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