So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
She's sitting on the couch buck naked, eating a cupcake for dinner. I'm breaking new ground as a parent here.
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
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