Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
What's the point of bringing a Jack and Coke to work if my boss is just gonna piss and moan about me day drinking again?
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
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