I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
Do you have any booze?
Well I have 60 feet of bubble wrap and a bottle of wine...but I'm saving that for a special girl...
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
Randomize
