just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
Go tell your boss to go fuck himself because you have beer and doritos and zombies waiting on you
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
Drunk is not a location!
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
i out mim tonsoeep
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