He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
Also, ran into my neighbor across the street. He told me about scheduling his vasectomy. We are officially way beyond the acceptable point for asking his name again.
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
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